Wrapping it up

3:42 p.m. Today's project was to delve into our closets and collect coats, gloves, knit caps, sweaters and heavy shirts to donate to g

Goodwill downtown. We had received a bag and collection slip from a group we always donate to, the Vietnam Veterans, but their collection date is the 23rd, too late for the poor and homeless to benefit from coats in this cold snap. We'll give them a bagful of other items when that date arrives, and I posted their card prominently on the "business center" at the end of my counter.

It's always fun to reminisce about the era of my old coats and sweaters, and I treated myself to memories today, of a size 8 younger self that could fit into a gaudily decorated teacher's Christmas jumper just ten years ago... I would have preferred to give it to my teacher/daughter Heidi, but she has shrieked at the sight of it more than once, like, "how could you be seen in that?!" Ditto for my even more outrageous Christmas sweater, too big for me even now, that should allow the next wearer to put on a few layers under it. A more toned-down Christmas sweatshirt went into the box also. I still wear Christmas clothes and jewelry, let it be noted!

One very presentable coat is made of really heavy denim, wool lined, knee length with both zipper and toggle buttons. That coat has taken me into the mountains with Steve and the kids, and to every single Easter sunrise service for the last 25 years. The weight of it alone has caused it to stay in the closet downstairs the last few years, because warm and weight are no longer synonymous in this era of new lightweight, but cozy fabrics. Sigh...the passing of yet another era, my young motherhood years.

Fast forward to today, after our return from the Goodwill. I was looking looking for a project Steve could do independently so I could work on the computer and then go out to the garden. I showed him some small "white elephant" gifts, as well as gifts for the kids, and mentioned that the wrapping paper was located in the office catch-all closet (where he had stored it recently). While opening the metal closet door, he cut himself , so we got a tiny bandaid and went back to the table where I'd placed everything needed to get the job done. (Steve had been unable to find the Christmas bags or paper). Tape, scissors, pens for the name tags, all ready to go.

After several minutes, and my stopping by the table several times to unearth the items he needed out of his jumble, I heard a tearing noise, and Steve's frustration was painful to watch. This from the man whose gift wrapping skills were legendary--his perfectionism gave our family creatively decorated gifts under the tree every year. Oddly, Steve had wrapped two very large and awkward "white elephants" for Home Fellowship just two days ago! I quickly wrapped the gifts myself while he did some cleaning, so it was not a big deal. We then went out to walk the dogs, enjoying the cool breeze, togetherness, and the personalities of Bailey and Jada, frustration and irritation forgotten!

What a thief Alzheimer's is, as my old friend Honey Simons once said. It's tragic evidence of the fallen world we live in as well.

Jesus said in John 10:10, speaking of the devil, "The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy." How well we know that in our home, where Steve has been robbed not only of memory, but of initiative, originality, perseverance and the ingenious solutions that he was known for in the workplaces and lives of so many people. The frustration has left him a virtually humorless shell of his real self, and an anxious, hunted expression has replaced the bright and inquisitive expression in his eyes. Gone is the joy in teaching the kids skills and the confidence in his ability to troubleshoot any mechanical problem he was presented with.

Steve and I still have a lot of fun together, and a thriving personal companionship that transcends mental processes. We pray and share the Word together, and he works very hard to participate in our Home Fellowship and family times. I noticed how hard he tries to stay engaged, even at the grocery store, as he helped me look for bubble gum today. He reads labels of products before putting them in the cart, whereas I just toss things in and am on to the next thing simultaneously. I was delighted to see him get a plastic produce bag open after just a little while, and he selected his own bananas. Even now, Steve lit the gas barbeque for his favorite meal, hamburgers!

As I go out after dinner to make sure the gas is turned off, I will be grateful that we have a long and happy marriage, and that God has given us the courage to go into a devastating future together in faith, and has provided all that is required to do it.

Philippians 4:19 says, "And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus." Faith is the language spoken here in this house--we believe, and we receive, all our needs daily. Verse 20 goes on to say, "Now to our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen."