At first I felt guilty for not going directly downstairs and beginning my devotions--Bible reading, scripture posting and journals-- as soon as I had my coffee in hand, while Steve started his shower. But the Lord has shown me that I have much more responsibility for my husband's safety now. I can attribute the tragic loss of our lab Bailey a few weeks ago to my being in the shower while Steve was busy outside and left the gate open, which allowed the dogs to get out. He can no longer be left unsupervised, even for a few minutes.
I was speaking with a sister at Home Fellowship last night, whose grandfather was so severely affected by Alzheimer's that he went missing from Montebello for 4 days, and was finally found in neighboring Baldwin Park, where gang members had jumped and robbed him! This gentleman would go into the neighbor's homes and wander off regularly. It becomes impossible for one person to watch an active late-stage Alzheimer's victim, whose frustration causes them to run out of the door with no regard for appropriateness or safety. How blessed we are to have installed an alarm system when we first bought this home 23 years ago, that chimes whenever a door is opened! And my ability to supervise Steve is supplemented by caregivers who watch him diligently whenever I need to go on a business appointment or to Bible study. His weekly attendance at Care Connexxus adult daycare gives me Wednesdays to dedicate to the Lord and the new book He has directed me to write.
God is a huge part of the work His children do, and if we are in His will, He is the Instigator, Leader, Advisor and Implementer of every goal we set. He is the Completer as well, the Alpha and Omega! (Revelation 22:13)
Because I have had the willingness to admit that I am not the end-all, be-all of my husband's disease management, God has sent providers with procedures in place that actually are more effective for Steve's various needs than I am! I have no training in lifting and moving a person much larger than myself, even if I didn't have a bad back. And I'm not necessarily the most skilled in calmly "redirecting" him when he becomes resistant or irate. By midday, I confess that I run out of ideas for Steve when he aimlessly walks around saying, "What can I do?" [Care Connexxus has a full day's activities planned everyday].
Caregivers look at Steve with totally fresh eyes, as he is right now; whereas I, his wife of 30 years, constantly hurt for the person my husband was until two years ago. His fits of anger and trying to run out the door seem to be a rejection of me, even though I learned in care giving classes that IT'S THE DISEASE! He has started making fists, and throwing small objects, and pulling on his hair when upset. He tried to walk out of the neurologist's office because he couldn't complete a physical action she asked him to do to ascertain his brain-body reflexes. I merely told him that he needed to sit down because he couldn't get out. Convinced, he sat back down.
Mondays are a great day for me to call women I've met at weekend Mary Kay parties or at boutiques where I've shown our gift line, like I did Saturday. My Friday evening hostess Karen gave me the names of the ladies who'd missed the party (mutual friends and acquaintances from church) and so far I've booked three facials and a party. One guest called to arrange for an on-the-go purchase. My product order should be here tomorrow to meet the suddenly large demand. My happy hostess' rewards and discounts are growing and growing!! As I deliver products, I can also discuss this wonderful opportunity with friends. And my new recruit Jennifer has booked a party already!
And I am helping the gals on my team who are starting their own successful Mary Kay businesses, setting an example of God-led hard work, every last bit of it lifted up to my Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ. The "beauty" of my business is that between all of this booking, I was able to mail a birthday gift to my grandson; fax in a bill for Care Connexxus to Genworth long term insurance; buy the picture frame for Heidi's bridal portrait; make a bank deposit; serve lunch; get gas; meet with our pastor; buy groceries at Winco; take Steve to his doctor appointment, and make a second trip to the bank with a deposit! Tomorrow I will be at Bible study, so today is the day for working my business!
I'm probably not finished yet, because Steve is now thoroughly enjoying that "blast from the past," America's Funniest Home Videos. It will be fun to share all of my good news with my sales director and our unit as an encouragement to other consultants on our Legacy call tonight at 9 p.m. There's no competition--we encourage one another in the Lord!
As Steve went out to spend some time with Jada, I made another appointment or two, and enjoyed lovely conversations as well. God is so good! I feel His Hand of blessing today!
The LORD your God will make you abound in all of the work of your hand, in the fruit of your body, in the increase of your livestock, and in the produce of your land for good.
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