My Internet had been out for three days--I know and can hear it--"poor baby"-- and I was fit to be tied, because I'd need to email out the written lessons for the chapter to scores of women later this afternoon. So for the umpteenth time, I tried to log on to my desktop computer and received the white screen that said, "Internet Explorer cannot open the program." Then for good measure I tried to do the same on my mini-notebook computer. Only this time, I received a blue screen with tiny white writing, whose error code, according to my techie son-in-law, means there might be malware involved! Great...
I'd been calling Verizon to see if a bill needed to be paid, but because I used my cellphone, the automated program though it was that account I was calling for, and kept assuring me that my bill was paid. Blessed with a good morning otherwise, I finished my devotions and determined to check on it again after my husband left for his daycare. And predictably weith all I have goung on, I'd forgotten to pay the bill! all is well for now.
Actually, today I woke up rested, because Steve had slept through the night. Since I last posted, Steve had been walking around in the bedroom for hours each night. We know God didn't design anyone but new mothers to get up all night and then take care of a household all day! And the "sundowning" that late-stage dementia patients fall into, is often the breaking point where even the best intentioned family caregivers have to seek a placement for their loved ones. Yet, rather than jumping into a placement option, I sought the Lord in obediencefor an interim step. The verse I posted on Facebook this morning, using my smart phone, was Psalm 41:17:
But I am poor and needy;
Yet the LORD thinks upon me.
You are my help and my
deliverer;
Do not delay, O my God.
And God had thought upon me, because He told me to have a caregiver from our agency come over for a few hours after Steve goes to bed to tend to his needs and allow me to sleep. So I did just that, allowing the afternoon caregiver to train the night shift caregiver in putting Steve to bed. I particularly wanted to have peace and a focused mind last night, because I went to Harvest Christian Fellowship to hear Pastor and daily radio teacher James McDonald give his "Vertical Church" message. His message, or the gist that I took from it, was that the church needs to stop looking around, and spewing out opinions from Oprah and Dr. Phil, and look up, to the Source of true help and deliverance for any and all needs God's people could ever have. Before he even spoke, he led a packed sanctuary in an anointed time of prayer, where those of us with deep, serious hurts and trials literally held up our arms to heaven with those near us in the pew supporting us by laying on hands where they sat. I'm trusting You anew, Lord! The message was powerful, and the band led by Landon McDonald was awesome too.
Upon arriving home, I had the night caregiver stay until 11:00, but Steve was quietly sleeping the night. Tonight he's still asleep, thought the helper went home an hour ago. So, were the two wandering nights, Monday and Tuesday, a fluke? And, though it seems rather crass to mention it, is the addition of an additional shift financially sound, when Raincross (the memory and assisted living facility I selected) can meet all of my husband's needs in safety, security, and comfort 24 hours a day at possibly less expense? What would the Lord have me do?
At each point in our family's dementia journey, there's been a new direction to go, new supplements or methods or programs to try. So in a future blog post, you may see a NEW new plan.! Isaiah 43:19:
Behold, I will do a new thing,
Now it shall spring forth;
Shall you not know it?
I will even make a road in the
wilderness
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