Now that the Lord has lightened my active care giving duties for Steve, it's time to pursue achievement of my personal goals. There's no logic to the postponement, except that when one is overwhelmed mentally and emotionally with a spouse's serious illness, positive, healthful and beneficial activities and plans get put on a back burner--even if there is time to pursue them. Proverbs 13:12 explains it well:
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life.
I've had a number of top personal goals (other than growth in Christ, helping my family, my business or ministry). These are for Dana:
1. Lose weight, get in shape, get my flexibility back and ward off arthritis and stroke
2. Repair the back yard fences
3. Rewire the automatic sprinkler system so I don't have to water each station by hand
4. Pull out the garden for the end of the growing season and start this year's composting
5. Re-seed or sod the back yard.
Three workout sessions have been semi-successfully completed! By 6:30, I'm sweaty, my heart rate is up, and I'm cleaning up the back , watering the front yard, and getting all the water bowls set out for the dogs. I also reminisce about running a mile with my 6th grade students only three-and-a -half years ago, in addition to race walking around the neighborhood. I closed our LA Fitness gym membership when Steve lost his profession, but never have quite found a way to burn the calories and strengthen my muscles the way I did there. The two of us used to walk down and up the Canyon Crest Hill, but that ended with his challenged mobility. And this year, even though Steve was going to bed at 7:00 p.m., it would be unethical and potentially dangerous to leave a dementia victim alone in the house. So I couldn't resume my evening walks like the two of us used to enjoy when Steve could accompany me. I miss those times of agreeable companionship! Amos 3:3:
Can two walk together unless they be agreed?
So now my walking is more like marching, high stepping and running with "Faithful Workouts" in our family room.It's a blessing to exercise to the lively beats of contemporary Christian praise and worship songs. Now if I can only get the steps exactly right and on the beat! All in good time...
Thank You, Lord, that You have seen fit to provide me a way back--to fitness!