Saturday, December 26, 2009
Go or No go?
4:09 p.m. Today's project is to get the Jeep packed with Steve's and my white elephant gifts, the wrapped 1/2 pints of spiced yellow tomato jam I made for the family, and go to his older brother's home for a post-Christmas get-together. With Larry's current state of Alzheimer's, needing living assistance and no longer able to speak at the age of 57, this will be the last Christmas he'll enjoy recognizing famliy members. How I wish we the celebration could have been on Christmas Eve, as our family had all planned on! But at least Steve and I will go for dessert and games, because our kids all have other plans set a long time ago. We as Christians need to be "as good as our word," because Jesus said in Matthew5:37, "Let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,' 'No.' "
After an amazing Christmas Day full of family, gifts, a 4-course Mexican dinner headed up by Marisela, Kriss' wife, and a fun game of "Things" with all of the young people, I was the "last
(wo)man standing," cleaning my kitchen, setting up the vitamins and the morning's coffee. My bedtime was somewhere around 2 a.m., but we had no event to get up for. Steve let the dogs out around 8, crawled back into bed, and then we started the day as we always do, with our devotions, at 10:00.
Youngest son Steven went to a meeting with his bodybuilding diet coach, so we talked when he returned from Hemet. I felt led to ask Steven a question that had been kind of "rumpling around" in my spirit the last few months, ever since I saw his ministry to the youth in Fresno, and which had intensified when he revealed that he has been given the gift of healing: "Do you think that God has called you to full time ministry?" After all, everything but his church work has been an extreme struggle and characterized by lack: funds for school, clients at the gym, making his rent with two jobs, soon to be three. It's been one roadblock after another!
He said, "I hadn't thought of it." But speaking from experience, I countered, "Whether you think about it or not, God just goes upside your head and tells you what He wants you to do--quietly, but firmly. He decides, and He'll let you know." Steven pondered and then said, "I know God wants me to help people [as a physical therapist]..." "I'm not seeing any contradiction there," I replied. "Just pray about it." He went out to visit old school buddies, and will be leaving for Fresno late this afternoon.
Meanwhile, Steve was watching a Christian humor video, then helped me clear out a cupboard we think may have roaches--eww--and then said he wasn't feeling well, and went to possibly throw up. He then crashed and slept a few hours. I called his older sister and said we might not be there, and I'd know by 6 p.m. If we eat later, it will be some non-spicy chicken I'm baking right now. So I'll see shortly if Steve's dizziness goes away. Oops! He just threw up!
No matter what may be planned by humans, God chooses when to disrupt the plan and teach a lesson with it! Many times, I'll suspect what the disrupted plan is meant to convey; sometimes it's so direct that I can't miss it; other times, I won't find out until later; another time, the lesson wasn't even for me; still another time, I figure I won't find out until I get to heaven! Since I currently don't know why we are being prevented from attending this family gathering, I'll just be at peace knowing what Job says about God in Chapter 9:10-12:
He does great things past finding out;
Yes, wonders without number.
If He goes by me, I do not see Him;
If he moves past, I do not perceive Him.
If he takes away, who can hinder Him?
Who can say to Him, 'What are you doing?'
We won't be at the family gathering, but we'll have a few moments to see Steven off, and pray for his trip and eventual ministry! I think this is a good day to agree with God's plan--like it is every day!